Essential Documents for Spouses

1.  Power of Attorney (POA)

  The power of attorney is normally used by an individual   who is unable to be present at a particular time and/or   place when important personal transactions must be   conducted. The scope of a power of attorney may be as   broad or as narrow as its maker wishes.

  General Power of Attorney

  A general power of attorney gives an agent all the power   the principal possesses to act with respect to any   matter. It allows the agent the power to do all things the   principal could do himself/herself, such as withdraw   money from savings accounts, borrow money, and sign   contracts.

or

  Special Power of Attorney

  A special or limited power of attorney authorizes an   agent to do a certain specified act, such as the shipping   of household goods, or the selling of a house or an   automobile.

2.  Wills

  What is a Will?

  A will is a legal document which states your desires   concerning what will happen to your property after   your death. A will also contains other specific   directions from you concerning who is to implement   your instructions and, perhaps, who will care for any   minor children you may leave behind.

  Why Should I make a Will?

  If the Soldier dies without a valid will, the distribution   of your property will be governed by the laws of your   domicile or state of legal residence, and perhaps by   the laws  of the state in which the Soldier dies. The   Soldiers wishes will usually not be considered.

  Is all of a Soldiers Property Controlled by his/her   Will   when they die?

  No! For example, proceeds of life insurance policies   (including SGLI) are distributed as the Soldier   designated in the insurance policy, and property that   he/she owns jointly with another person will   normally go to the other joint owner. Likewise,   certain bank accounts which are payable on death   go directly to the beneficiary. Property passed to   beneficiaries in  these ways avoids the probate   proceeding.

The Deployment Emotional Cycle

The 7 Stages

Stage one – Anticipation of Departure

                     (1–6 weeks before departure)

Before the deployment it is not uncommon for spouses to protest, to feel tense, to be frustrated and to avoid the reality of the Trooper’s departure. Spouses may unexpectedly find themselves crying at what may seem to be little things. There is also tension as couples cram a multitude of activities in a reduced time frame. There are things to fix, things to do, and people to see. It can be a hectic and frustrating time.

Stage Two - Detachment and Withdrawal

                     (week before departure)

Detachment may begin before the actual departure. There may be anger and emotional break-offs as people prepare for separation. It can be a time of mixed feelings as one attempts to protect oneself from hurt by distancing, yet wants to make the most of the available time. At the beginning of this stage the spouse may experience the grief of loss. Detachment will also be a part of the whole separation time. It is the state of routine, day to day, living.

Stage Three - Emotional Disorganization

                        (1-6 weeks into deployment)

Emotional disorganization can occur initially when the spouse attempts to make new routines and carry out their duties. Many spouses are depressed and withdraw from friends and neighbors, especially if the neighbors’ spouses are home. They often feel overwhelmed as they face total responsibility for family affairs. The disorganization soon passes, however, as the spouse recovers.

Important notes to remember during both stage two and three is take care of your and your children’s health. Shop and cook for healthy nutrition. Get plenty of rest and exercise. In addition, avoid trying to do everything all by yourself. Contact family, friends, neighbors, and spouses of other deployed Trooper’s whenever you need practical or emotional support. There are many other spouses in your unit family that are dealing with the same emotions and increased responsibilities that you are feeling. Often it helps just to talk to someone in the “same boat.”

 

Stage Four – Recovery and stabilization

                      (between weeks 3 & 5).

Recovery and stabilization occurs as the spouse gets set into a routine and realizes they are doing fine. It is a time of increased confidence. A subconscious move from “we” to “me” has taken place at least to some degree. The spouse often refers to “my house,” “my car,” and “my kids.” Most spouses have a new sense of independence and freedom and take pride in their ability to cope.

Stage Five – Anticipation of return

                     (6 weeks before return).

This is the “Oh boy! They’re almost home,” stage. With it comes excitement and anxiety. Some spouses become frenzied, as they rush around trying to make everything perfect for their Trooper’s return. Many spouses start diets and pick up the pace of doing what ever it is they feel must be done before the Trooper returns.

Important notes to remember for stage five is don’t expect things to be perfect after the reunion. Consider setting aside quiet time during the first few days. Avoid planning a busy schedule of events. Even though reunion is exciting, it can be stressful, too. Changes may have occurred and you both will need time to adjust. He gained weight, she changed her hair, and the kids probably have grown. Another area to think about is the budget. There will be increased food costs and greater transportation costs.

Stage Six – Return adjustment and renegotiation

                    (6 weeks after return).

Upon return to home the phase of adjustment and renegotiation of the relationship begins. The set of assumptions and expectations need to be reset, and reevaluated (fine tuned), to account for the changes that have occurred in the past 6 months or year. It may be a time of tension and fighting. This is, however, normal and to be expected. Communication is the key. Especially during stage six. Remember, open, honest communication can solve many problems or conflicts.

Stage Seven – Reintegration and stabilization

                         (6-12  weeks after return).

The last stage is when reintegration of the family is complete and things have stabilized. The move from “me” (my house, my car, my kids) to “us” (our house, our car, our kids) is complete. The returning spouse is a part of the family again, and “normal” life resumes.

Red Cross Emergency Messages

RED CROSS MESSAGES

 

To notify your Soldier of an EMERGENCY while in Iraq, the Red Cross must be notified. The Red Cross will verify the emergency (e.g. Hospital, Doctor, funeral home, etc.) to begin the notification procedures.  The rear detachment commander is always available to assist you through this process.

1. Call your Fort Hood Red Cross Agency during

    business hours at:  254-287-0400 or the 24 hour

    emergency line at     1-877-272-7337.

2. Please ensure that the following is available:

        ►  Soldier’s name, rank and Social Security

              Number (SSN)

        ►  Soldier’s unit and deployment address

        ►  Emergency situation and relation to Soldier

        ►  Name, address, telephone number of the

              hospital, doctor, funeral home, etc. that can

              verify the emergency.

        ►  Local point of contact and phone number of

              the person in the area of the situation.

3. The Red Cross will then pass the information to the

     unit. The Forward Commander will have the

     final authority approving or disapproving

     someone to return on leave under emergency

    conditions because of the Red Cross message.

    The approval process is not done by Red Cross

    or the Rear Detachment.

4. If leave is approved, transportation arrangements

    will be made by the military to ensure the Soldier is

    able to return to the place where his/her presence is

    required.

Military Family Life Consultants

WHAT IS THE MILITARY FAMILY LIFE CONSULTANT (MFLC) PROGRAM?

Military and Family Life Consultants (MFLC) provide solution-oriented consultations to individuals, couples, families, and groups. 

The Military and Family Life Consultant (MFLC) Program is designed to provide support and assistance to active duty Soldiers, National Guard & Reserves, military Family Members and civilian personnel. Military and Family Life   Consultants can help people who are having trouble coping with concerns and issues of daily life.

Some Examples of Issues Include:

Adjustment/Transition

Stress

Marital/couples

Anxiety/Sadness

Deployment Cycle Issues

Communication

Aggression

Work, parenting

Grief/loss

MFLC Solutions:

Flexible appointment times & Flexible meeting locations

*Confidential - No Records Kept

FREE

*Duty to warn does apply in cases of threat to self, others, and any reportable abuse issues.
BDE MFLC Office:  254-317-3512

BDE MFLC email: 2ndbct1cavmflc@gmail.com

Email mflc.fthood@gmail.com

254-383-2571 / 254-383-3684 / 254-383-1631

254-630-6218 / 254-630-6240

Soldier & Family Readiness Branch Building 18000

Oveta Culp Hobby Soldier & Family Readiness Center On Battalion Avenue Next to the Copeland Soldier Service Center

Finances

Need a copy of the (Leave & Earning Statement) LES?

 

With the new pay system DIMHRS, a spouse can no longer access their Soldiers LES’ online. In order to get a copy of the LES, the spouses needs to take his/her POA to the S1 and pick up a hard copy.

My Soldier’s pay is incorrect:

Contact your Rear Detachment Command Team, S-1 or Command Financial Specialist (CFS).

 I don’t know how to pay my bills:

a.  If the Soldier is still here and  the one that

     usually handles the bills, the best way to pay

     the bills is to set up allotments or pay via the

     internet.

b. If the Soldier has already deployed, contact

    your unit’s CFS or Army Community Services 

    (ACS) in order to make a reservation for the 

    necessary financial class.

Emergency Financial Help:

a. Army Emergency Relief (AER) Loans can help

    in the following circumstances: 

 ► Non-receipt of pay, no food, medical and funeral

      expenses, loss of  funds, emergency travel, utilities

      to prevent cut-off, rent to prevent eviction,  and

      essential POV repairs.

b. ALL REQUESTS FOR EMERGENCY FUNDS MUST

    BE DONE THROUGH YOUR UNIT COMMAND

    FINANCIAL SPECIALIST AND REAR

    DETACHMENT COMMANDER. YOU MUST HAVE

    A POWER OF ATTORNEY FROM YOUR SOLIDER

    GRANTING YOU THE RIGHT TO GET A LOAN IN

    THEIR NAME.

What is Family Readiness?

Family Readiness is when families are prepared and equipped with the skills and tools to successfully meet the challenges of military life.

Start by Getting Connected

Becoming “Family Ready” and staying “Family Strong” is something that the entire Family starts to do long before the announcement of mobilization and deployment orders are cut. Staying Family Strong starts now, and must be prepared for and maintained throughout the Soldiers career.

▪ As a Family – Know that the Soldier and the Family must work together to deal with the challenges of being an Army Family.

▪ With the Unit – Understand the overall objective of service in the military and become fully appreciative of the demands that exist for Soldiers.

▪ To Programs, Agencies, Organizations and Resources – Know the various agencies and resources that are available to Soldiers and Family members.

“The health of our all-volunteer force, or Soldier-volunteers, our Family-volunteers, depends on the health of the Family … I can assure you that your Army leadership understands the important contributions each and every one of you makes. We need to make sure we step up and provide the support Families need so the Army Family stays healthy and ready.”

It is extremely important that the Soldier’s spouse / family members provide current contact information (telephone numbers and email addresses) to the FRG and/or Rear Detachment Command Teams so they can be included in the official flow of information . In addition when the spouse / family member leaves the area, please notify the Rear Detachment so there is never a loss in the ability to contact the family should a need arise.